An Inconvenient Life

Letting go of the life I was expected to lead.

Menu
  • Home
  • Feedback
Menu

What Happens When an Introvert Pretends to be an Extrovert?

Posted on 02/07/2020 by margrad80

Let’s face it I really would be happy as a clam in my apartment with my nose buried in my computer all the time. It’s always hard for me to convince myself to go out and play tourist. Of course, once I do, I always enjoy it. I try to make sure that my apartments are a good distance away from the market, so that I am forced to get out more, or things end up like in Medellin, where the market was two block away, and I spent three months deep in video games.

Even harder for me is getting out and socializing. I have always been very good at striking up conversations with complete strangers then passing on my way, never to see them again, but to join a group and keep going back has always been a problem for me.

That being said, I do understand that other long term travelers might love to socialize and look forward to joining groups in their temporary homes. I have found that even for someone like me, finding social events while traveling is very easy nowadays. In Ecuador, using the website Meetup, I found a language exchange group, which meet once a week quite close to my place. I also found an American expat Thanksgiving dinner though an expat website. In Mexico and Colombia, I didn’t socialize though I chatted with my neighbors a lot.

Warsaw was wonderful, because not only did I spend a lot of time with my friend, she was always bringing other friends with her. When we couldn’t get together she sent me notices of various events around town. I really took advantage of the free wine tastings, where I keep running across the same folks. It as fun to walk into one and be greeted like an old friend.

As I traveled, I took advantage of the various expat websites. Not often for socializing, but to get information about living a more normal life wherever I was at the time. I forget what I was looking for, in Arequipa, but I wasn’t having much luck with the expat sites, when I got the idea of looking for expat groups on Facebook. I had recently been joining groups focused on my interests, to push certain people so down on my news-feed so that I wouldn’t see them. (I am trying not to block people because of their religion or politics.)

I quickly found two groups for Arequipa. Expats Arequipa and the other also called Expats Arequipa. I really haven’t figured that one out yet. Both pages have been interesting and informative. I have received a lot of help from folks, about extending my visa, finding restaurants, and even understanding why there is often wood smoke in the air. Every week I saw an invitation to attend a Board Game night. Every week I thought about going.

I had been in Peru for over 90 days when the organizer of the board game night asked if anyone would be interested in a language exchange. I was all over that. Quickly others responded that they too were interested. Socializing is much more interesting to me if I have a non-social reason for going, like bettering my langrage skills, having a good meal, or getting free wine.

One the night of the first language exchange, I headed out early because I had decided to walk. I figured that I could always flag down a taxi if it got too dark or if it started to rain. As I walked the clouds became darker and darker, until they were black with ragged bottoms. When the first drop of rain hit me, I looked to my right and saw that one of small shops had a stand at the door filled with s/15.00 (about $4.50 USD) umbrellas. I bought one and headed on my way.

Though it was quite dark, I really didn’t feel the sort of fear I used to feel after dark in certain areas of Honolulu. There was no one sleeping on the sidewalks, and the streets were quite busy with foot traffic. I had the location of the meeting programed into my phone, but I really didn’t look at it until I got to the part of the city with lots of random little streets. It wasn’t long before I was peeking though a window into a bright and cheery bar.

Well, Commander McMullen always said, I was going nowhere.
Of course he could have been wrong, and I am Now Here!

It was good to get out of the rain and into the Nowhere Cerveza Artesanal. (Read Nowhere Brew Pub). I was there too early and I was hungry. The food was pub grub, but it had been a while since I had had a burger and fries. While I waited for the others, hoping that the rain wasn’t keeping them home, I ate one of the best hamburgers I have ever had in my life. Even if I wasn’t sitting in a charming bar in South American it would have been wonderful. I am always complaining about not being able to get good fries, but this night I had nothing to complain about.

I will leave the umbrella behind for the next occupant of my apartment when I go.

The bartender spoke perfect English, which was sort of disappointing, since I love forcing locals into giving me impromptu language lessons. My meal and two 12 oz glasses of sour set me back $14.38 USD. I got to meet the brewmaster, and told him just how much I liked the sours.

It was a pretty quiet night for the bartender, until the rest of my group showed up.
I saw a meeting forming up and I went to join them only to find out that it wasn’t my group. It was the owners meeting with a supplier.
Despite the rain we had had good turn out.
Photo courtesy of Javiera Dastres.

The meeting was fun. After we had all become tired of language practice, the socializing began. Time flew and before I knew it, everyone was lining up to settle their tabs. As we waited our turn, a dog, which I guess was the owners’ was dashing around with a ball. Everyone was kicking it for him. We tried to kick it out into the courtyard, where he would chase it down and return to the bar. I was a lot of fun.

It was when I saw this photo I began to become disenchanted with the low light performance of my OG iPhone X.
Photo courtesy of Javiera Dastres.
For a comparison, this was taken by my iPhone. I guess I will have to start saving for an iPhone 12.
I didn’t know until I saw it on Facebook the next day, that this photo had been taken. I got in touch with Javiera and asked if I could use her photos in my blog.
Photo courtesy of Javiera Dastres.

I walked part of the way back home with one of the women. After she turned off to make her way home. I continued to my place. As I walked, I realized that in the dead of night, the streets looked very different. I still didn’t feel uncomfortable. The few people I saw looked like middle class folks heading home after drinks with friends. I was worried that without the stores being open with displays on the street I might not recognize my turn. Then I realized that If I overshot I would find myself at the corner with the hairdresser, and that sign I would recognize. The only thing I was worried about was crossing the railroad tracks, as I had seen some very large stray dogs in that area. I guess that all the dogs were settled in for the night.

Once I had gotten to meet everyone, it made it a lot easier two days later to attend the board game night. I was a little disappointed that it was held at a cafe and not a bar, but having the children there was a lot of fun. I normally love other people’s children.

She had played this game a lot, and even though she arranged the cards to face me, she still trounced me hand after hand.

None of the games I had ever heard of, but this one was a speed matching game with some interesting rules. I finished last, but had a great time.

Photo courtesy of Javiera Dastres.
When we were finished, we posed with the box, before moving onto another game.
Photo courtesy of Javiera Dastres.
The game can be frustrating, but she was actually just brushing her hair back. She was there with her husband and two children.

The second game at my end of the table was one where you used a timer while you arranged shapes on a card. I finished next to the last with this one, and felt very accomplished.

This young man, goes to college in Shanghai. Thanks to the Novel Coronavirus he is going to be with us for a while.
This young lady grue up in Houston, Tx though she is Peruvian.
Though there was no beer, there were banana-free smoothies. Mine was mango. I didn’t get to play the game next to me. Maybe next time.
Photo courtesy of Javiera Dastres.

After a couple of games we changed places at the table and I found myself playing with the rest of the dutch family. This card stacking game was a lot of fun.

The second game I played with the family was one where you had to read a bit of Spanish. The other games I played that night were for younger children, so no reading needed. The children were very familiar with the game and were correcting their parents game play a lot.

The young lady took the game play very seriously.
It was a good turn out.
Photo courtesy of Javiera Dastres.
Photo courtesy of Javiera Dastres.
Photo courtesy of Javiera Dastres.

I was really looking forward to the next language exchange night. The weather was much better, and I didn’t get there too early since I knew just how long it would take to get there now that knew just where it was. Again we had a nice turnout. There were some new faces. It was a good time. I was having such fun talking, that I didn’t take any photos.

I had eaten dinner, so I only a a bowl of French fries with my beer.
Photo courtesy of Javiera Dastres.

Again, the night was over too soon. I walked with one of the gang to his bus stop then headed off in the direction I thought I needed to go. When I found myself at Plaza de Armas, I knew I had gone in the wrong direction. It was a lucky mistake. Late at night the plaza was beautiful. There were plenty of folks enjoying the rain free evening.

There are a lot of restaurants in the upper level of the plaza.
Taxis line up in hope of serving the late night diners.
I was surprised to find that the fountain was dry. Children took advantage of this by playing ball in it.

I pulled out my phone and set it to take me home. I was pretty sure that I knew how to get home from the plaza, but it was too late for any more detours, as much as I enjoyed the plaza at night. The lower road is far quieter, than the one I had walked over on. It was almost spooky.

Even the daycare center took on a spooky air in the dark night.
It was a pleasant walk through well lit streets. I took this photo in one of the rare moments when there wasn’t several people walking their dogs.

I was glad to find that even out in the residential areas the streets were well lit. Though I had always carried a flashlight at night in Mexico, I hadn’t thought to buy one here. As I walked, I saw many street vendors still selling food to passerbys. People were out walking their dogs. They all exchanged quiet greeting with me, as if they were being careful not to disturb the folks in nearby apartments. When I was about home, I passed a group of young professionals, who hearing my accent greeted me with “Good afternoon.” It was nice to get to correct someone, rather than being corrected myself.

I was really looking forward to the game board night, but after spending the day filling out forms for moving my last remaining possessions from Hawaii to Texas, I had a headache, so bad that wouldn’t even let me lean over to put on my shoes. Why do people think that crookedly scanning a printed form into their computer and emailing to you is a good idea? I had to deskew it and add all the text fields before filling it out sending it back, as a flattened PDF.On top of everything it was filled with shipper’s jargon, which I had to keep looking up. I hope I can make it to the game board night next week.

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Reddit
  • Tumblr
  • Pinterest
  • Pocket
  • Telegram
  • WhatsApp
  • Skype
  • Email

2 thoughts on “What Happens When an Introvert Pretends to be an Extrovert?”

  1. Lucas says:
    02/15/2020 at 10:12 pm

    Glad to hear you’re socializing. Personally I’ve never been much of a board game person. My father was way too competitive with what games we played. Took the fun way. Loved the evening photos from the plaza. Loving forward to seeing you next month. A hui hou …

    Reply
    1. margrad80 says:
      02/16/2020 at 6:58 am

      Thanks I am glad you enjoyed it. I too don’t like board games with competitive people. The game we play are new to most every one. I f we can’t figure out the instructions the man who runs the place teaches us. It turns out to be a Spanish lesson as the native speakers translate what he says.

      Reply

Let me know if anyone is out there :) Cancel reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

My Inconvenient Live

I am a retired American Merchant Mariner.  l was living a nomadic lifestyle somewhere between being a nomad and an expat, before Covid19. I moved from country to country as my visas ran out. This blog covered my travels and the random thoughts about life, technology, travel, and the Oxford comma. Now I am stuck waiting for the pandemic to pass. During this time my posts will have very little to do with traveling, and more to do with keeping myself entertained during lockdown.

Subscribe to Blog via Email

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Site Navigation

  • Travel
    • Travel Planning
      • Accommodations
      • The Basics
      • Budgeting
      • Getting Ready
      • Packing
      • Transportation
    • Americas
      • Colombia
      • Mexico
        • Guanajuato
      • Ecuador
        • Galapagos
        • Cuenca
      • Peru
        • Arequipa
      • United States
    • Europe
      • Greece
      • France
      • Poland
        • Warsaw
      • Spain
      • United Kingdom
        • Scotland
        • England
    • Postcards
    • Travel Minutia
  • Nomad’s Food
    • food
      • Street Food
    • Cooking
    • Beer
    • Coffee
    • Recipes
    • Wine
  • Shopping
  • Geek Life
    • Computer Follies
    • Gaming
      • Stardew Valley
  • History
    • Childhood Memories
    • Cadet Memories
    • Coast Guard Years
  • Random Thought
    • Life Hacks
    • Retirement
    • Pontificating
    • Talking Story
  • Books
    • Novels by S. L. Pirtle
      • The Ten Year Divorce
      • The Accidental Texan
    • Book Reviews
  • Travelogues
    • 1990 Italy
    • Greece 1998
    • 1999 Scotland
    • Spain 2000
  • Privacy Policy

Archives

  • June 2021
  • October 2020
  • September 2020
  • July 2020
  • May 2020
  • April 2020
  • March 2020
  • February 2020
  • January 2020
  • December 2019
  • November 2019
  • October 2019
  • September 2019
  • August 2019
  • July 2019
  • June 2019
  • May 2019
  • April 2019
  • March 2019
  • February 2019
  • January 2019
  • December 2018
  • November 2018
  • October 2018
  • September 2018
  • July 2018
  • June 2018
  • April 2018
  • March 2018
  • February 2018
©2023 An Inconvenient Life | WordPress Theme by Superbthemes.com
 

Loading Comments...